Rise up a genuine leader Who is driven by moral character and integrity Who commits to truth and responsibility Who models personal discipline and accountability Who earns respect by giving it Who is humble in self-imperfections and gracious in others’ Who nurtures trust and collaboration
Rise up a genuine leader Who is we-oriented, not me-oriented Who articulates vision with clarity and infuses pride in purpose Who disables barriers to people development Who confronts social ills with positive solutions Who seeks understanding and resolutions in contentions Who fosters creativity and inspires hope
Rise up a genuine leader Who can undo chaos and create order Who is composed instead of clamorous Who promotes diversity of viewpoints in unity of purpose Who invests in people and worthy dreams Who is transparent, trustworthy, and teachable Who upholds faith in a better future and spurs actions toward it
Rise up a genuine leader Who values people and ideas over profit Who knows virtue sustains character, but its absence destroys it Who is considerate instead of caustic Who brings competence with candor Who discerns realities with compassion and directs resolutions with care Who influences people to mutually elevate lives, institutions, and ideals.
Rise up a genuine leader Who is attentive to needs of the people and builds their spirit Who overcomes personal ego, arrogance, and unethical behavior Who rejects conflict mongering Who is consistent and persistent in value-added contributions Who equips and empowers other leaders Who builds an enduring legacy of transformational results
Last year, I participated in a provoking thought exercise with my counterparts from other states. We attempted to develop an alternate term for “recreation and parks.”
Schuylkill River Trail. credit: Visit Philadelphia
Because recreation and parks means something different to practically every person, and carries unwanted baggage of being regarded as trivial, even laughable, and less worthy than more “important” things, we wanted to explore what single term could encompass all its comprehensive benefits.
Eleanor Warmack, CEO of the Florida Recreation and Park Association, declares, “If our industry was a corporation, we would have rebranded ourselves 20 times by now. This profession has evolved—we cannot keep using terminology from 100 years ago to limit what the public thinks of our value, nor to allow our profession to be defined by three words.”
In the book The Blue Zones of Happiness, author Dan Buettner cites research from 141 countries to distill what contributes most to life satisfaction all over the world, and offers practical lessons to making happiness a personal lifestyle.
It’s fairly easy to be happy in any particular moment, of course. The challenge is to sustain an ongoing pursuit of what he calls the three P’s—purpose, pleasure, and pride—the universal keys to life fulfillment, regardless of culture or personality. And while personal discipline can go only so far, Buettner advocates “for strategies that make changes to our surroundings…that constantly nudge us into doing the right things so we don’t have to remember them on our own.”
Our governments, communities, and workplaces; our social networks, homes, and finances; and even our inner lives can be “happier by design,” he asserts. Each of his designing blueprints for happiness enumerates specific action steps for advancing our personal and collective purpose, pleasure, and pride.
In the book’s foreword, Ed Diener summarizes, “We now know that happiness is an essential part of functioning well, and that it gives a boost in well-being not only to individuals, but also to those around them, their communities, and their societies. Rather than being a luxury to be pursued only after we take care of the more important things in life, happiness is beneficial to everything else we desire: It aids our health and helps us live longer; it aids our social functioning and makes us better citizens; it helps us perform better at work; and it builds up our resilience, which enables us to bounce back after setbacks or when bad events occur in our lives. The happier we are, the better we are for our friends and family, our workplaces, our communities, and our society as a whole.”
Doesn’t this passage sound like what we strive for in providing recreation and park services?
Now back to the rebranding term for recreation and parks.
Our creative thought exercise was tough. We identified what we wanted the new phrase to embody. We noted that some park and recreation agencies are transitioning to alternate terms, like the Community Enrichment Department in St. Petersburg, Florida. We tried out new phrases. We even enlisted ChatGPT to invent a new word, which came up with such disastrous results as “recrarks,” “culturisure,” “leisureplex,” and “communivital.” Our discussion was quite stimulating, but so far, we’ve failed to invent anything that conveys so much so concisely.
But—doesn’t the above description of happiness come so very close? There might be a case for it. After all, its pursuit is singled out as an important tenet in one of our nation’s founding documents. And as everyone knows, it’s one of the inalienable rights of “We the People!”
What do you think? All comments and suggestions are welcome!
Supportive relationships bring vitality to reality. We are very grateful to our friends and family who have stood by us during some of our most challenging times. This year, we were able to publish our story of raising our youngest son on a high functioning sliver of the autism spectrum. As the first student in the school district diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, he became the blunt instrument of change it required but didn’t know it needed.
Each phase of life can be a stepping stone to progress. From the distinct advantage of countless wayfinding steps more than 20 years in the making, we’re now able to tell the tale of our passage. But at the time, we hadn’t a clue to the route, or the fuss we would create.
Words of faith determine the journey’s end before I arrive. In October this year, we celebrated our 45th anniversary. We couldn’t have imagined most of what our lives have become, but we know Who holds our future, and that faith has both carried us through and worked out all things for our good.
Intentional steps bring opportunities that alter destinies. In February, Philip obtained a position as a Research Engineer, after the persevering quest of 7 years and 840 job applications. We helped move him to Webster, NY and unload the truck during a winter squall off Lake Ontario with -10° windchill and near-whiteout conditions!
A strong sense of purpose overrides the pain of fulfilling it. The bold statements in this post come from several of the chapter openings in Stepping Stones: our pathfinding adventure with Asperger’s. In it, we share how we hadn’t planned to be pioneers in an arduous journey—but that’s where we have found love, courage, hope, faith, learning, humor, growth, failure, trial, and triumph—everything that rounds out a life well-lived.
Only by overcoming challenges to my progress do I advance toward it. Stepping Stones is a trail guide of hope for all the parents and caregivers of children who: appear to have advantages, but somehow do not; want to be happy and fit in, but largely cannot; yearn to be treated respectfully, but usually are not.
I affirm the worth of my potential and progress toward a favorable future. Despite advances in diagnoses, therapies and other accommodations, many systemic inequities against the neurodivergent remain to be dismantled. This book introduces the concepts required to continue organizational change. And to all parents and caregivers of children with Autism Spectrum Disorder, this true tale offers pragmatic guidance, self-help encouragement, and real reason for hope.
Ignorance imprisons the mind, but learning liberates the spirit. Philip wrote the last chapter of the book, recounting the life lessons he learned in grad school and in securing a full-time job. He also created the back cover artwork and others in the book. Produced by solving and plotting the results of hundreds of millions of polynomial equations, and then stacked and colorized, he’s named this type of mathematical art “polyplots.”
Sit in peace. Stand on principle. Soar with purpose. Stepping Stones is available in print or ebook through our website timandcarolherd.com, Barnes & Noble, Amazon, and other booksellers.
We believe in the message our little memoir contains, and we’re trying to reach as many people as possible. We are available for speaking to groups and for book signings. If you are an active Amazon customer, you can post a review, regardless of where you have purchased the book.
We offer this story of our experience to the great range of parents, caregivers, therapists, and support networks—as well as those who are on the autism spectrum themselves—as our like-missioned, kindred spirits. And we thank you for your support.
Respect is the blue chip stock of social capital. Investing it in pays large and growing dividends.
It isn’t image. It’s not the money. And it isn’t power, prestige or even political capital: What drives both progress and profits inside every organization is a simple thing called respect.
Universally recognized and traded (“It’s everywhere you want to be!”), respect is the currency of people on the move, who know and work its profitable exchange rate in the commerce of getting things done.
Leaders in every industry deal primarily in social capital—networks of social connections, interpersonal relationships, and shared values and ethics, that enable and encourage mutually advantageous cooperation toward shared ambitions. And respect is the blue chip stock of social capital. Investing it in pays large and growing dividends.
Yet as exalted as this lucrative performer is, respect is a stock in trade that cannot be bought—only earned. Here are 12 guaranteed ways to stop yearning and start earning respect:
1. Give it. Treating others the way you want to be treated is not just an ancient adage, but remains a golden rule for living today. In the economy of respect, the more you give, the more you gain: confer courtesy, bestow honor, and dish out dignity—and you’ll earn many happy returns.
2. Practice self-respect. Despite your own faults and failures (everyone has a slew of them), know that you are worthy of high esteem and unbiased regard. Treat yourself accordingly. Unsubscribe from the steady stream of negative self-talk and invest instead in a constructively healthy lifestyle.
3. Be authentic. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Avoid duplicitous talk and vague vows. Wear no masks; build no facades. Be sincere in all your conversations and genuine in all your compliments. Be the real you all the time.
4. Stay open to criticism. Since no one’s perfect—including you—remain humble and teachable to advance through your mistakes and setbacks. If you can take it on the chin without running off at the mouth, both your restraint and resolve will be duly noted and respected by others.
5. Be discreet. Gossiping and talking behind someone’s back reflects worse on you than your victim. Respecting other’s confidences builds your own trustworthy character.
6. Be professional. Know your job and be good at it. Producing outcomes without excuses and results beyond expectations shows both accountability and dependability. Grow in competence to build a stellar reputation and harvest honor.
7. Know what and why you believe, and act on it. Living and leading by a moral code shows you are committed to integrity, purpose, and responsibility. Believe in your own ideals and ideas and be able to intelligently support them in the marketplace.
8. Keep your word. Honor the integrity of your own commitments. Promptly returning phone calls and emails, consistently meeting deadlines, and intentionally delivering on all your promises not only stands out against the mediocre crowd, but also builds trust, loyalty, gratitude and esteem from your peers.
9. Champion others. No matter what the relationship, seek to add value to other people by actively supporting the right to their views and their contributions to the cause. Stand up for others, especially those who can’t for themselves.
10. Listen emphatically. Nothing speaks louder in terms of valuing other people than genuinely listening to them. Seek not to merely appear to hear, but comprehend and understand. Exuding genuine empathy is powerfully endearing, and helps you make a difference in a person’s life.
11. Be generous. People admire those who give their time, talent and resources to help them reach their goals. Be lavish with praise, bighearted in attitude, charitable with assistance and liberal in sharing.
12. Stay relentlessly positive. Maintaining a perpetually positive outlook nurtures the best results in overcoming challenges, developing relationships, evolving solutions, fulfilling potential, generating respect, and attracting reputable associates.
